dumb product alert: Breakfix Cereal Dispenser

This automatic cereal dispenser makes breakfast quick and easy!
With the automatic Breakfix Cereal Dispenser, fixing the day's first meal will never again be a messy, time consuming chore. Breakfix uses the same principles as a coffee-maker, dispensing pre-measured portions of cereal with a touch of a button -- no mess, no fuss.

Controlled portions also help to keep pounds off. Looks great in your kitchen and cleans in a snap. A healthy gift for the whole family -- the kids will love it!

Corporate America sure thinks highly of us, don't they? Apparently, there's a widespread epidemic of overfilling cereal bowls. Sure, I've thought for years that the process of opening up a box of cereal and pouring into my bowl is a "messy, time consuming chore." Last week I poured some Golden Grahams into my shoe by mistake. In 2002, it took me seventeen and a half hours to successfully pour a bowl of Crispix. And I don't even want to talk about the 1997 incident in the breakfast nook that took four lives.

But now, I own the Breakfix Cereal Dispenser, and life is good. It's as if a whole new world has opened up to me. With the time and energy I've saved from using the Breakfix Cereal Dispenser, I can get back to more important projects, like mapping the human genome, or finishing up my work on successfully achieving cold fusion in my garage.

Spotted on SkyMall, the magazine Stephen Colbert calls “the best source for solar-powered, self-inflating pool equipment.”

SkyMall related links:

• L.A. Times: Sky's the Limit
• Washington Post: Material Guy: Happiness Is A Trip To The SkyMall